“I don’t understand this new war.”

“I’m not sure I understand it, either, Aussie. I think Israel wanted to seize this opportunity to finally neutralize the Iranian regime. You know why?”

“Why?”

“Because they and the US damaged the Iranian attack capabilities a great deal last June and they’d like to finish the job. You know why, Aussie?”

“Why?”

“Because Iran’s radical Islamic leaders always call the US Satan and Israel a cancer. You want to know why, Auss?”

“Not really.”

“In our case, because we, especially the CIA and the Brits, got rid of nationalist Prime Minister Mohammad Mossadegh in the 1950s, an Iranian hero. You know why, Aussie?”

“Bor-ing.”

“Because back then he nationalized Iran’s oil production, saying it was their oil after all, not America’s or the UK.”

“Don’t cause and effect involve time?”

“What a deep philosophical question, Aussie. Certainly, in my mind—and maybe yours as well—when one thing causes another thing, that involves time, but that may just be how we perceive things. By now, everybody knows that time is an artificial construct.”

“Everybody?”

“Buddhists and scientists. Auss, humans need the element of time in order to negotiate the mayhem and porangi of life.”

“What’s porangi?”

“Māori for craziness. It looks crazy because we can’t control it.”

“One ever-changing porangi all the time.”

“Very good, Aussie. At least, it feels that way to us. Look at that amaryllis, Aussie, isn’t it gorgeous? And this is its second season. It flowered last winter, I took it out in the summer, put in soil and fertilizer, and brought it back in when it got cold. It was dry for most of this winter, didn’t seem to be going anywhere, and then—boom! Only now it’s on the floor. You know why?”

“Why?”

“Because it fell and I have to not just pick it up and put it back, I also have to clean up the soil from the rug. But I can’t. You know why?”

“Why?”

“Because the small hand vacuum cleaner is not charged. You know why, Auss?”

“Why?”

“Because when Henry throws around his stuffed red bear and it falls in that corner, it detaches the charger from the vacuum. You know why?”

“Because Henry is a Communist schmegegge? ENOUGH WITH YOU KNOW WHY? Why can’t you humans stop asking why?”

“Funny that you say that, Aussie. You know why?”

“SHUT UP!”

“You know what my calculus teacher in high school, Mr. Wallach, always said if someone asked him a question, like why is 3 squared 9 or why do 2 + 2 equal 4? He always said: ‘Because the cat told a lie.’”

“Why? NEVER MIND, FORGET I ASKED! But let me remind you how you guys always say that everything is one, right? If you take time out of it all, then everything is one thing, including cause and effect.”

“Very good, Aussie. I’m proud of you.”

“So, Henry and the amaryllis and Commie the red bear and the dirty rug and the portable vacuum that doesn’t work—all that long, fucking karma—who cares, right?”

“What do you mean, Aussie?”

“Because any way you look at it, your room is one big mess.”